194450

Joke of the Day

"""So You Think You Can Keep Your Stupid Talent to Yourself and Stop Bothering People?"" would be a show I'd watch."

"What's the most American food? Popcorn, because you have to blow it up before you eat it."

"A drum set falls out of a tree. Ba-dum-tis"

"I saw two construction workers laughing together today. I know what they were building... Friendship."

"Why should you never mention the number 288? Because it's two gross. source: someone told me this joke, it's not my joke."

"My friend recently tried to get appointed chancellor of Germany but failed. I told him he was literally worse than Hitler."

"Scientists have successfully grown vocal chords in a petri dish The results speak for themselves."

"Interviewer: Your resume only has ""Mad"" under ""Skills"" Me: Yeah boyee Interviewer: *tears up* You're just what we need. Welcome to Subway."

"Here's hoping 2013 is the year in which I finally fix the bugs in my new time machine. -garyDelaney"

"Holy lord, that sneeze felt so good I feel like I just cheated. I even named it Stan to further delude myself. I'm such a bad girl!"