193693

Joke of the Day

"I had a balloon with the reddit logo on it and I put it on the nozzle of a can of helium. It blew up pretty fast."

"It's not that hard to tell alligators and crocodiles apart... ...One will see you later, whereas the other will see you in a while."

"Hey General Motors, what about an electronic drum set on the steering wheel? You're welcome."

"I think I speak for Earth when I say that I'm ready for Justin Bieber to turn to hard drugs and squander his wealth, eventually losing fame."

"What do you call a French hooker in Pakistan? Lahore"

"Homeless girl ..... I met this girl the other day and gave her my phone number. She said she would call when she got home. I'm beginning to think she's homeless???"

"What do you call a cross between a human and a monkey? A nigger."

"The nicotine patch is great. I get my addiction out of the hands of the evil tobacco industry and into the loving arms of big pharma."

"I was sitting in traffic the other day got run over."

"What do you call a lost nun? A Roman Catholic"