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Joke of the Day

"Wow, busy day for Donald Trump. Tomorrow he'll probably ban dogs from homes, end Star Wars, put spiders in every shower and outlaw dreaming."

"What does spinach and anal sex have in common? If they were forced on you as a child you probably don't like them as an adult."

"What did the doctor say to the patient who wanted to do his own surgery? ""Suture self!"""

"[Long] longest joke in the world My dick Didn't see that coming."

"My pick-up line ""Hey girl are you a fallen angel? Because your face looks like it hit concrete."""

"What do you call a retired soldier who's been blighted with mustard gas and pepper spray? A seasoned veteran"

"19 showed us what he has learned at college when he asked ""can we drink screwdrivers while we are opening presents?"" *making screwdrivers*"

"A crazy girlfriend is like a box chocolates, They will both kill your dog."

"If you weren't supposed to eat 15 Oreos in one sitting, they wouldn't package them in rows of 15."

"Do you want to know what Jon Snow and yo momma have in common? They both can be stabbed multiple times and not die..."