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Joke of the Day

"Scientists announce porpoises are second to man in intelligence levels. So that pushes women down to third place. Sorry"

"What's the difference between a lawyer and a trampoline? You take your boots off to jump on a trampoline"

"What's the aim of a Jewish football match? Getting the quarterback."

"TIL you can get dishonorably discharged from the Navy for boarding the wrong vessel just once Whoops wrong sub"

"My prompt email replies are 10% due to me being a diligent employee, and 90% due to the crippling OCD that compels me to clear my inbox."

"What kind of bird works on a construction site? A Crane."

"I want to grab some Mexican tonight and then maybe have some dinner with him"

"[Riding a saddled turtle] BATTLE TORTOISE, GOOOO!! [turtle just goes normal speed for turtles] Aww man."

"High Quality Poem Error 404 Your Haiku could not be found Try again later"

"I had a dream I was a muffler I woke up exhausted"