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Joke of the Day

"Is Google male or female? Female - it doesn't let you finish a sentence before correcting you and making a suggestion."

"9/11 Jokes aren't funny... But the other 2 are."

"Parents yelling ""I'm not going to ask you again"" at their kids, will definitely be asking them again"

"Yes it was my birthday. I'm going to start lying about my age, but say I'm older so people say how good I look for 47."

"My wife just bought toilet paper from Costco which is great because later today we're having 3,000 people over to take a shit."

"A Jewish boy asks his father for $20. His father says, ""Ten dollars? What do you need five dollars for?"""

"You know what's messed up to find at the bottom of a jar of mayonnaise? A condom. haha"

"Mexican word of the day: Chicken Wing My wife plays the lottery so chicken wing some money."

"Him: You're not like other girls Me: [foghorn sound]"

"What's Beethoven's favorite fruit? Elton John."