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Joke of the Day

"Adorable idea. Colleagues have been writing names on their food in the office fridge. I am currently eating a yoghurt called Debbie"

"What is a duck's favorite drug? Quack. Girlfriend came up with it. It was so bad it was good."

"Why do feminists only drive cars with automatic transmissions? It pains them to have standards."

"If I were the Town Mayor, I would rename our bridge ""The Influence."" ... Then I would direct the police to pull over and ticket everyone driving under The Influence."

"There's only way we can end this; we have to kill the head Wayans."

"I once had a job circumcising Elephants at a Zoo The work was hard but the tips were huge!"

"Have you ever heard of the movie ""Constipation""? No? Most likely because it never came out."

"Me: Wanna go out? Her: You're not Black Me: I'm Jewish. We've been persecuted more than them. Her: ... Me: That's not why you like them?"

"Why are pirates called pirates? Because they arrh."

"Things I suck at:1. Being attractive.2. Being normal.3. Relationships.4. Texting back.5. Math.6. Life."