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Joke of the Day
"What did the river say when coal barges stopped?"
Next Joke
"Sometimes i flirt and i feel really akward. Idk if the people around me are gonna hate more for it. I have this rly weird feeling in my stomach and sometimes idk why. Oh wait not flirt. I ment fart"
"I don't like holocaust jokes ...because my grandpa died in the holocaust. He fell off a guard tower."
"Thank you, slow walking family in front of me on the footpath, No please, take your time.... and definitely spread out, so you create a barricade of idiots."
"Republicans were just informed about the effects of Global Warming on the polar ice caps They're losing their cool!"
"Yo mama so ugly for Halloween she trick or treats on the phone!"
"How is American Beer similar to making love in a canoe? They're both fucking close to water."
"Kinda messed up that marijuana is just a plant. Like, what other plants are drugs? *tries to smoke a carrot* Yea I guess I'm feelin it"
"I want this Twitter account to outlive me by 100 years. I want my grandchildren to read my Tweets and say, ""Holy fuck. She was so weird."""
"I call in sick on full moons just to make them wonder."