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Joke of the Day
"What is brown and sticky? A stick"
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"What's the difference between a lonely person getting trolled and a wanted sexual offender? Ones a pranked Redditor, the other is a ranked predator."
"*Sandra Bullock floating around in the background of all the new Star Wars movies*"
"A thief stole my gate the other day, but I didn't report him I was afraid he might take a fence"
"What's the best thing about fucking twenty eight year olds? There's twenty of 'em!"
"For 20 years, I've pretended to be the head of propaganda at my company. I'm not really, I just tell everyone I am and they believe me."
"My Roommate wanted me to play the popular game Fuck, Marry, Kill... But now I am confused. What should I do with my husband's dead body?"
"So much wasted time in public school, as an adult I've never used cursive, done algebra, or had to remember anything from sex ed."
"I like my women like I like my wine... Six years old and locked in a cellar."
"Some fantastically good advice about proper care of your butthole. That's right. Your butthole. [PIC]"