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Joke of the Day

"Nobody gets treated worse than a McDonald's worker who gets an order wrong. ""Um this was SUPPOSED to be a LARGE fry! UnFUCKINGbelievable!"""

"Repost- How do you circumcise a redneck? Kick his sister in the jaw."

"What do you call a poor pepper farmer? A jalapeno pauper"

"What's the difference between Justin Bieber and Pinocchio? Some day, Pinocchio's going to be a real boy."

"What is a germans favorite passtime at a concert? They jump off the stage to go krautsurfing."

"I once farted in the Apple Store and everybody got pissed It's not my fault they don't have Windows"

"I'm at my most ""floor manager"" when I'm falling down drunk."

"[Frugal] I ran behind a bus all the way home and save $2.25. Got home and girlfriend mocked me saying had I run behind a cab, I would have saved $15."

"It's a good thing the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles wore masks, or people might have recognized the 4 giant turtles at their day jobs."

"Do you ever just stop and think about how snowmen standing out in the snow is like humans standing outside while it rains bits of flesh"