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Joke of the Day

"What's a rapists favorite meal? Spaghetti-No's I'm sorry."

"Q: Why did the suspenders get arrested? A: Because they held up a pair of pants."

"I had a racing snail... To make him more aero-dynamic I took off its shell. If anything it made him more sluggish"

"""If you're pregnant you can't get pregnant, the same goes for getting arrested, can you lick this?"" I ask, trying to roll a joint in cuffs."

"Why are the Soviets Russian? Because there's no Stalin."

"Ever hear about that guy who sued the door factory? It was an open and shut case."

"All I do all day is roll massive joints and deal with huge quantities of dope. Being a pipe inspector sucks."

"How did NBC respond to someone who criticized their broadcasting? I (*commercial break*) can't (*commercial break*) understand (*commercial break*) your accent (*commercial break*)."

"Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because she suspected that 7 knew she had witnessed a murder he had committed the night before."

"I like my coffee like I like my ships. Full of semen."