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Joke of the Day

"How did NBC respond to someone who criticized their broadcasting? I (*commercial break*) can't (*commercial break*) understand (*commercial break*) your accent (*commercial break*)."

Next Joke
 
"I bet you're the asshole that says ""we"" when talking about your favorite sports team like you're on the actual roster."
"When I was ten I played Secret Agent with my little brother. Turns out toddlers do not make good grappling hooks."
"i like my women like i like my coffee silent"
"This whole time I thought 50 Shades of Grey was a coloring book for dogs"
"What do you call an underwater masochist? A submarine!"
"[in bed] Her: *seductively whispering* in the mood for a midnight snack? Me: *Oreo crumbs all over my face* I'm way ahead of you"
"Why does George Zimmerman keep popping up every 6 months or so? Is he the McRib?"
"Fact about apple car It has Windows"
"I got fired from a suicide hotline Apparently they look down upon reverse psychology."