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Joke of the Day

"I told my friend that I disproved the theory of conservation of mass, But he didn't understand the weight of the situation."

" Is this the real life? Are you a manatee? Let's beat up french fries I should lay off the LSD "

"What does autocorrect and women have in common? They both jump to concussion"

"Tried to catch fog the other day... Mist"

"I'm trying out a new idea for using gum that's lost its flavor. Right now, it's just an ex-spearmint. (Sorry)"

"Just killed a cricket at work, and, long story short, I'm now being asked to audition for Riverdance."

"I blame my parents subscription to National Geographic when I was a kid for my preference for black women."

"What did one saggy boob say to the other? We better get some support soon, or people are gonna mistake us for nuts."

"X = Y The teacher asked the student, ""If x=y, what is x?"" The student answered, ""y?"" The teacher replied, ""why not?"""

"There was this story on overcrowded animal shelters... I just couldn't put it down."