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Joke of the Day

"Tom Hanks is extremely polite... In fact, every time someone asks him for an autograph, he's the one that ends up saying ""T.Hanks"""

"On the Mexican side of the US-Mexico border, there are guards. On the US side, there are trampolines."

"Clicks ""open"" Tries door Clicks ""open"" Tries door Clicks ""open"" Tries door What the FU.. Wrong car (I have a master's degree)"

"What do you call an oval with a speech impediment? An Elipshhh"

"The only difference between a psychiatrist and a drug dealer is that the drug dealer doesn't make you wait an hour."

"My sheep friends asked me to find them some drugs so I went to the local animal dealer... Pablo Escobaaaaaa"

"9 out of 10 depressed people are not positive thinkers."

"a lady walks into her house but then the she realizes she does not have a home for living and is sleeping in trash bag"

"When I pay for my groceries and the cashier hands me the receipt I like to smile and say ""this will all be poop soon""."

"What happens when U change position too fast? You get an unpleasant vowel movement."