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Joke of the Day

"I wear a stethoscope, so that in the case of a medical emergency, I can teach people a valuable lesson about assumptions."

"[Date] Her: Any hobbies? Me: Monging mostly. Her: Huh? Me: I'm a monger Her: Huh? Me: Iron, fish, war... You name it -- I'll monger it"

"What do you call an Asian who is always on time? Thai Mingh Ha. Ha. Ha."

"Do you know why Bill Cosby likes Jam more than he likes Jelly? Because he can't jelly his dick in someone."

"World's most Ridiculous alarm clock http://youtu.be/cHHHpbVJiOE"

"US voters have definitively proven You can go black and then go back"

"I'd tell you a chemistry joke but I know I wouldn't get a reaction."

"""Are we going the right way, Yoda?"" ""Off course, we are!"" Happy May 4th everyone"

"A black women names all of her 4 children Tyrone... How did she tell them apart? She looked at their last names..."

"Am I the only one who wants to write ""Over"" at the end of my tweets? Over."