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Joke of the Day

"8 hrs sleep: So refreshed 6 hrs: Feeling fine 4 hrs: I will rip your head off for a minor transgression 2 hrs: Why is my boss a Minotaur"

"Cop: Do you know how fast you were going, ma'am? Me: I left my pills in my other bag & I'm about to get REALLY chatty. C: You're free to go."

"How do you get 1000 dead babies into a phone booth? A blender. How do you get them out? Tostitos"

"Watching the end credits of a movie so you can take note of the producer & director and never ever watch anything else that they make "

"Saw two blind people fighting today. I said, ""I think that the guy with the knife will win!"" They both ran away. Edit: Grammar"

"How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They can't change anything."

"My first mistake was thinking she couldn't hit a moving target."

"What do you call Rihanna if she gets fat? A Rihanna Grande"

"Your luggage has wheels on it? You know, that guy Jesus didn't have WHEELS on that cross thingy he had to lug around. You people disgust me."

"""Is Pepsi OK?"" - World's worst drug dealer"