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Joke of the Day

"You know you're good when they have to add an amendment to the company handbook cause they never thought anyone would do what you did"

Next Joke
 
"Whoever invented the forklift over estimated the weight of forks"
"*weighs self* ""Shit"" *takes clothes off* ""GODDAMMIT"" *takes tampon out*"
"Mom, i'm going out -You are not going out with that mini skirt. -But why? -Because they can see your balls, David."
"Why do terrorists have high sex drives? Because their sperms are always ready and eager for suicide missions."
"A Magician was driving down the street. Then he turn into a driveway."
"Why is Hellen Keller a bad driver? Because she is dead."
"What does a calculus teacher say when a student doesn't get it? Bro, do you even function?"
"a murder of crows, a troop of monkeys, a pod of dolphins, a herpe of Kardashians"
"What do you call the useless objects a company possesses? Asshats (assets - asshats)"