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Joke of the Day

"So when is too soon to ask your friend if you can borrow their baby to reenact The Lion King? One day old? Two?"

"whenever god closes a door he opens a window because he's taking a pretty nasty shit in there."

"""How did the blind girl explain her pregnancy?"" She said she didn't see him coming"

"A racist joke What is the difference between a pizza and a black guy? A pizza can feed a family of four."

"What's a clown's favorite thing to eat? Really anything that's heavy enough to beat somebody to death with, such as a motorcycle helmet or a cannonball."

"Sometimes you feel like you've grown. Other times you pout for a few hours because your wife accidentally threw away your Tabasco sauce."

"Where does Peter Pan like to eat out? Wendy's."

"What did Barack say to Michelle when he proposed? I don't want to be Obama self."

"What did the spoon say when he caught his knife cheating on him? Get the fork outta here!"

"So an Irish man walks out of a bar..."