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Joke of the Day
"I automatically HATE whoever ""declined to be interviewed for this documentary."""
Next Joke
"How many minutes equal one orgasm ? One eight year old."
"What do you call it when Bob Dylan sucks your dick in a hurricane? The answer my friend... is blowing in the wind. The answer is blowing in the wind."
"Me: Weaknesses? Oh, I'd say not relating well to other sentient beings. -I meant about the janitor job. Me: Oh ya, I don't know how to sweep"
"My 4 year old refused his dinner but it's ok because I caught him eating a Milkbone earlier"
"How do you know you're a Seattle Seahawk? A butler serves you."
"what is the most common second language in the united states? Dora the Explorer spanish"
"The closest I get to exercising is when I trip on the sidewalk and pretend jog for like 10 feet."
"Two Apple Farmers, a baby, and an extremely agitated Sugar Glider walk into a bar... ... ... ... ... ... I don't remember how it ends but your mothers a whore."
"A friend asked me if I'd rather marry a mediocre woman, or my dream girl-- plus a dick. ""That's easy,"" I said. ""I don't want to settle for average. I'll take the girl with two dicks."""