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Joke of the Day

"Geez, there's a lot of people on this Ashley Madison list... It's a pretty bad state of affairs"

"""Because it would be hilarious,"" is probably not a good reason to elect someone to be president."

"What am I? What has six tits and three teeth? The night shift at the Waffle House."

"Are you a shark, cause I got some swimmers for you to swallow."

"Is this where you put your jokes? According to my ex wife my career and penis should be here"

"I hate when my boyfriend's snoring wakes me up and then I realize it was my snoring and I don't have a boyfriend and I'm going to die alone."

"There's a C cup, a T cup, and a P cup The C cup is for drinking coffee The T cup is for drinking tea And the P cup is used to get a Mexican to work"

"It's nice that friends keep picking up my kids for play dates. It'd be even nicer if they'd stop bringing them back home."

"When girls or any women ask you ""What?"" In reply, it isn't because they didn't hear you. Its because they are giving you a CHANCE to CHANGE what you just said."

"WARNING! If you get an e-mail with the title of ""Nude Photo of Newt Gingrich"" DO NOT OPEN IT! It IS a nude photo of Newt Gingrich."