189235

Joke of the Day

"I have really bad hay fever Which means I have an uncontrollable desire to have sex with the straw man from the wizard of Oz"

"My friend just told me I don't know how to make jokes. That's shit because I once sent ten of my puns to an online contest. No, they didn't make it to the finals... No pun in ten did."

"BOSS: Okay, let's do this. What names are you pitching? COWORKER: Hannah Montana ME: Assapoopshits Massachusetts BOSS: Michael you're fired"

"Scandanavian Booty Call What did the Norse goddess say to Thor when he drunk dialed her? ""I aint no Valhalla back girl."""

"What's the difference between unlawful and illegal? One is against the law and the other is a sick bird."

"What do Foghorn Leghorn and Donald Trump have in common? They're both big racist cocks"

"""Another day another dollar."" - African kids"

"Whats the difference between a gorilla and a guillotine? No one gets their dick out for a guillotine"

"It sucks how if you say hi to someone once, you're now committed to saying hi to them the rest of your entire life."

"My wife and I said we would only smoke after sex.... I have had the same pack of cigarettes since 2007, im starting to get worried about my wife though shes been going through 3 packs a day!"