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Joke of the Day

"hey i just met you and this is crazy but i'm your mom now you small weak baby"

"I hope Elon Musk never gets in a scandal Because Elongate would be really drawn out."

"Good Cop: If you confess now, you'll probably just get probation. Fad Cop: Hey Macarena!"

"I gauge a person's wealth by the level of protection on their iPhone. No case, huge salary."

"Why did the scarecrow get a promotion? He was outstanding in his field"

"i just cant stand peadophiles they're fucking immature arseholes"

"(Original) did you know that if you squeeze one of your balls hard enough you'll cum? Because sooner or later you'll bust a nut"

"Two snowmen were talking on a cold day... One of them said to the other: ""funny, I smell carrots too!"""

"What's the difference between you and a baby bird. The bird got laid."

"If I'm ever in a coma unplug me. Then plug me back in and see if that fixes the problem."