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Joke of the Day
"I could tell you some great jokes about unemployed people... But none of them work."
Next Joke
"[bankruptcy court] JUDGE: *rubbing bridge of nose* Says here you bought 1000 bouncy castles? ME: *lips on mic* For my kingdom, Your Honor"
"Newt Gingrich's face looks like a fat woman's knee."
"Oh yeah? Well if I'm so gay like you say, then why do I have to think about my wife when I have sex with dudes, hmmm?"
"I have a sexual attraction and fetish for car races I just love getting off to a good start"
"ALFRED: *wringing out wet birthday party invitation* it's difficult to read, but i'd hazard a guess at aquaman, master wayne"
"My biggest fear is dying alone. Not really stoked to die with people either. You know, dying in general doesn't exactly sound like pancakes."
"why did they bury liberace face down? so his friends could stop by for a cold one..."
"How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? Don't be silly, glass ceilings don't have lightbulbs!"
"My wife is talking about wanting to have children. I don't think I am ready for her to be a single mom."