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Joke of the Day

"I'll never forget what my grandfather told me before he died. He said ""Never forget what I'm about to tell you"" then some story about corn."

"Did you hear about the circus fire? ...it was intents!"

"Naming my daughter ""A Relationship"" so I don't have to worry about punks wanting to be in her."

"[australia's first national meeting] Do we want to make our own language? That's too hard, let's keep this one but say everything weird"

"An asian man goes to the eye doctor... Doctor: ""Sir you have cataracts."" Asian man: ""No I drive a honda."""

"Just finished building doors for my fish. I'm highly skilled in the field of carp-entry."

"Did you know Helen Keller had a male roommate? (Neither did she.)"

"Case In Court After The Jasleen Kaur Case He argued... She argued... . . . . He shouted... She shouted... . . . . .. and then she cried...... . . . . Result: She won by Duckworth-Lewis method !!"

"I was out with my bf and a waiter called me a 'cradle robber' cuz he's 18 and I'm 43. Totally ruined our 10th anniversary."

"Why did the cat put the letter ""M"" into the fridge ? Because it turns ""ice"" into ""mice"" !"