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Joke of the Day

"What do you call it when a rabbit tactfully jumps in front of a line? A nice hare cut"

"the greatest joke of all time. my life"

"Stop making fun of the fat girl Shes thick and tired of it."

"*runs in out of breath* Friend: what's going on? Me: [heavy breathing] bear with me Friend: Ok *waits* *bear runs in, also out of breath*"

"I bought my girlfriend a fridge for her birthday. Not a great gift I know, but you should've seen her face light up when she opened it."

"Son: Mom! What's a gf? Mom: if you're a good boy, you'll get one when you're older. Son: What is I'm not a good boy? Mom: You'll get many."

"Guy finds secret trick into heaven... Gods hate him"

"[at a fancy restuarant] WIFE: make sure u leave a good tip ME: ok [writing on bill] ""only evolve ur pokemon when uve activated a lucky egg"""

"Recent studies have shown that 67% of women have used vibrators The other 33% have brand new ones"

"[describing criminal to sketch artist] He had the damp chest of a man with an excessive lisp. He was eating a newspaper."