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Joke of the Day

"""What should we name them?"" Grapes ""And what about these?"" Grapefruits ""I see. So one is a larger version of another?"" Not at all ""Perfect"""

"What did Yoda say when he watched Star Wars on Blu-Ray? HDMI"

"What's a neckbeard's favorite asian country? M'Laysia"

"How do you make holy water? Boil the *hell* out of it."

"I used to think I was homophobic. It turns out that I was just afraid of monsters in the closet."

"What do you call four drowning Mexicans? Cuatro Sink-O"

"Q: Why do Southern guys go to family reunions? A: To meet chicks."

"[looking at wife's tombstone] today would've been our anniversary *falls to knees* why did I pre-buy her tombstone causing her to divorce me"

"(My favourite joke when I was a kid) Did you hear about the constipated mathematician? He worked it out with a pencil."

"What do you call an Asian-Indian man, who is standing on one leg? Balan Singh"