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Joke of the Day

"LIFE HACK: Make your waist feel dramatically smaller by accidentally trying on maternity pants."

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"Dr. King Schultz wins the Oscar.. The white man profiting yet again at the expense of the black man."
"The American flag Red with blood Blue with tears White with privilege"
"How do you make rude noises on the Internet? With a whoop e-cushion."
"What's the most common pickup line at a gay bar? May I please push in your stool?"
"What would you hear at a cow concert? Moo-sic!"
"Give a man a match... [inspirational quote] Give a man a match, and he'll be warm for an hour... Light a man of fire, well, he'll be warm for the rest of his life."
"A young child says to his mother... ""Mom, when I'm a grown-up I want to be a musician."" She replies, ""Well honey, you know you can't be both."""
"I gave my bus seat to a blind man this morning... I lost my job as a bus driver."
"Unscramble: pnise If you got spine, you are correct. The rest of you have been on twitter too long."