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Joke of the Day

"Looks like the heavy bag of sirloins fell off the top shelf, landing on the butchers head, and killing him. Looks like the steaks *shades* were too high. YEAAHHHHHHHH!!!!"

"Gotta admire the Nazi's ethics on medical research... ...since they advanced the field without hurting any animals."

"BOSS: I need to see you in my office ME: *I begrudgingly take off my invisibility cloak* oh alright"

"Where do the cleverest parrots live? In the brain tree forests!"

"What do you call someone addicted to both crack and weed? A rockin' roller."

"What goes well with a mans jean jacket? A suicide note."

"[At urinal maker store] Urinal maker: Let's make some of them curved so the pee splashes on their legs LOL. Other urinal maker: K. LOL"

"I just ate 40 cheese sticks in a row! BAM! Looks like I don't need a ""family"" to get ""value"" out of your stupid bag!"

"How do you know you're a Seattle Seahawk? A butler serves you."

"Why do chicken coops only have 2 doors? Because if they had 4 doors, they would be called chicken sedans..."