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Joke of the Day

"Freud was wrong, I have no desire to sleep with my mom I'd bang the shit out of my aunt, though."

"I was in a bad mood when my annoying sister asked me, ""What do beavers do to a river?"" God dam it"

"How do you stop a nuclear bomb from squeaking...? ...WMD40."

"Masturbation is great. - I know that from first hand experience."

"Why did Adele cross the road? So she could sing 'Hello from the other side'!"

"Despite evidence to the contrary, I still maintain typing louder and harder will magically make my incorrect password correct."

"Your momma's so fat, she's like the negative cosine of X... They both go down after pi"

"How did the Mathematician relieve his constipation? He worked it out with a pencil!"

"What's an owl's favorite subject? Owlgebra"

"What do you call an octopus that fights sharks? An octobrave. I'm sorry."