183678

Joke of the Day

"""I'm single and ready to mingle""..oh god, is this why I'm still single, cuz I say shit like that?"

"Triscuits are a good snack if you've already eaten all the other snacks in your house and the boxes they came in and your own hands"

"My Grandpa said, our generation relies too much on technology I replied, ""No, your generation relies too much on technology!"" Then I unplugged his life support."

"Forest fires always think my jokes are hilarious But it's probably just because they're blazing trees"

"My therapist says that to be happy in marriage, never go to sleep mad at each other. Been mad at my wife 2 months straight cause of insomnia"

"So glad my boobs don't honk. Talk about a mood-killer."

"A woman sits in a bar and orders a cocktail named ""Double Entendre"" So the barkeeper gives it to her."

"Here, let me loosen those morals for you."

"-.. .. -.. + -.-- --- ..- + ... . . + - .... . + .. -. - . .-. -. . - + .--- --- -.- . + .. -. + -- --- .-. ... . + -.-. --- -.. . .. - + .-- .- ... + -.. --- - + -.-. --- -- . -.. -.--"

"[Bethsaida 28 AD] BAKER: Such a huge crowd...I'm gonna sell so many loaves ""Five loaves please"" BAKER: Huh? ""Jesus is here"" BAKER: Sonuva"