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Joke of the Day

"So today I got tickets for the Kanye West concert... I misread it horribly though and I ended up somewhere in Africa"

"CAUGHT ON TAPE: Lint"

"why don't blind people skydive? Its scares the heck out of the dog."

"Time is the coin of life. Only you can determine how it will be spent."

"What is the opposite of a protein? An amateur teen ( )"

"Mum I found Dad Haven't I told you to stop making holes in the garden?"

"I like to ask people what their sign is and then read them a completely different sign's horoscope just to hear them say ""that's so me!"""

"So I was going to blame my pet ostrich for a crime i committed But my lawyer advised that it wouldn't fly in court."

"""This town ain't big enough for the two of us."" -Someone who is terrible at English, science, and geography."

"told my Subway sandwich artist the toppings I wanted but then I whispered ""love"" so now I can't go to that Subway anymore"