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Joke of the Day

"What program do Jedi use to PDF files? Adobe Wan Kenobi"

"In People's Republic of Korea... Dog eat you!"

"I helped an old guy cross the road today I carried his walking frame. Talk about ungrateful."

"The last thing my wife gave me before she died... ... was her epi pen. I don't know why, but it seemed like she thought it was very important that I have it."

"16: My friend is coming to get something while we're gone. Me: Should we leave a key? 16: No, she'll just go thru the doggie door again."

"What's a Scottish cannibal's favorite food? Mac in cheese"

"Why do black people have white palms? There's a little bit of good in everybody"

"I have a sexual attraction and fetish for car races I just love getting off to a good start"

"I could make a sandwich before a British person finishes saying ""et cetera."""

"The reason I hate my girlfriend a vegan She doesn't like to eat meat if you know what I mean."