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Joke of the Day

"I recently stopped sending monthly payments to my exorcist... Because of that my house was repossessed"

"Why did God create men first? Because we learn from mistakes."

"For some reason I'm only afraid of Middle Eastern spiders... It's O.K. though. My doctor says it's normal to be Iraqnaphobic."

"What's the difference between a Genealogist and a Gynocologist? One looks up your family tree, the other looks up your family bush."

"How many kids with ADD does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Wanna go bike riding?"

"Why does Steve Irwin hate sunblock? It doesn't protect from harmful rays"

"Instead of ""the John"" I decided to start calling my bathroom ""the Jim"" I needed to workout more. Now first thing in the morning I always go to the Jim!"

"Why would Louis and Clark adore living in todays age? Because the difficulty in finding the North-West passage significantly declined once we discovered it was Kim Kardashian's vagina."

"What did the bobby (English policeman) say to the hitchhiker with three heads, no arms and one leg? ""'Ello 'ello 'ello, you look 'armless, 'op in."""

"[ouija board] How are you feeling? *board begins spelling* O-O-E-Y--G-O-O-E-Y What the!? A cheesy board!? G-O-U-D-A--G-U-E-S-S"