181922

Joke of the Day

"What do you call a Mexican with a rubber toe? Rubber-Toe! (Roberto)"

"Q: How many Scorpios does it take to change a lightbulb? A: None - they'd rather sit in the dark."

"A boy asks his mother a question Boy: ""Mom, why's my cousin named Jasmine?"" Mom: ""That's because your aunt likes flowers."" Boy: ""Mom, what do you like?"" Mom: ""Oh, be quiet Richard"""

"A criminal burgles into a dormitory... He yells at one of the students: ""I'm looking for money!"" The student calmly replies: ""What a coincidence, I am too!"""

"Just trimming my nose hair and drinking a soy latte. Damn it feels good to be a gangsta."

"IN CASE OF FIRE BREAK GLASS *breaks glass* *a glazed honey ham pops out* ""Nice nice"""

"The human cannonball informs the circus manager that he plans to retire at the end of season. The distraught manager protests ""Where am I going to find another employee of your caliber?"""

"""Are you ignorant or just apathetic?"" ""I don't know, and I don't care."""

"Seriously wondering how many times is it appropriate to say ""What?"" before you just nod and smile because you still didn't hear what they said?"

"My girlfriend's best friend had her arm stuck in the dirt this morning She asked me how to get her hand out quickly. I told her, ""Dig south for her arm, bae."""