181628
Joke of the Day
"Your Costco ID photo shows you what you'd look like as a meth addict."
Next Joke
"[labels account ""18+""] [tweets exclusively about voting & buying cigarettes legally]"
"A farmer filled his truck with onions, but he crashed on the interstate. All his onions were smushed and ruined. The farmer was on the brink of crying."
"My English professor failed my essay on child birth They don't allow contractions in formal writing"
"Kids are so inquisitive. ""Will robots ever take over the world?"" Me: ""Almost certainly."" ""But when? Before I die?"" ""A bit before, yes."""
"HR: Do you know why we called you in here today? Me: I'm not taking off my Batman suit, sir."
"being in a club at my age feels more like i'm being set-up for an episode of ""To Catch a Predator"""
"Policeman: Didn't you hear my siren? Motorist: Sure that's why I sped up."
"'Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the house not a creature was stirring... Not even a mouse stirred."
"what do you call a racist Mexican a member of the que que que"