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Joke of the Day
"What do you call Harrison Ford when he smokes weed? ""Han So-High"""
Next Joke
"I would never take candy from a stranger, but I'd probably follow a trail of bacon straight into the back of a windowless white van."
"How do you turn on a lamp? By seducing it"
"Me and my girlfriend are just too different... I exist and she doesn't"
"What do you call a dinosaur who just got out of a relationship? Tyrannosaurus Ex"
"How does a lawyer sleep? First he lies on one side, then he lies on the other. Credit: Nicholas Sparks from his book 'See Me' which I am reading now."
"Probably the worst thing about getting taken down by a pack of Hyenas would be hearing them giggle while they eat you."
"My dick is good at math. What I'm trying to say is that it's the small things that count."
"Two things I will never understand the appeal of: 1) Open relationships 2) Hairless cats"
"A Blonde texts her friend A blonde texts her friend and asks ""what does IDK stand for?"" The friend replies ""I don't know"" The blonde texts back ""shit, no one seems to know"""