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Joke of the Day

"Why does Snoop Dogg carry an umbrella? Fo drizzle."

"I was having a nightmare where a dude said he was going to kill me if I could not make him laugh... so I said... What gas leaves a pirate speechless? . . . Argon"

"[1hr before date] Me: (to waiter) So when I order the extra spicy chicken you say 'brave choice sir' and then bring the Lemon Herb chicken"

"I'm just grateful that I don't have to draw on my eyebrows everyday because I would totally forget to do that."

"Khal Drogo Weighs in on Episode Leaks by Filmkritter on DeviantArt #OC"

"The vet told me ""I'm sorry, but I'm going to have to put your dog down."" ""Oh God!"" I said. ""WHY?!"" ""Because my arms are getting tired."""

"Just a morbid knock knock joke. : Knock Knock : Who's there : Not my dad : *Sob*"

"My friend said he knew a man with a wooden leg named Smith. So I asked him ""What was the name of his other leg?"""

"How does Brutus eat his salad? With a knife and Caesar dressing."

"What do you call a butthurt white guy? A salty cracker."