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Joke of the Day

"Why was Eric Clapton arrested? He was fingering A minor."

"I'd like to share a joke with you that my 2yo nephew told me. 2yo: Knock knock. Me: Who's there? 2yo: I don't know. *leaves"

"If I have an addiction to masturbation And I suddenly develop it into an addiction to sex, does that mean my addiction is getting out of hand?"

"What's the difference between purple and pink? The grip. "

"How did the hipster burn his mouth? He drank his coffee before it was cool."

"Don't ask the Norse professor about his old subject... It's a Thor subject. And he still doesn't want to Friggen talk about it."

"*guy collapses* ICE CREAM MAN: does anyone know CPR DOCTOR:*looks at ice cream cones in both his hands, looks up, then slowly walks away*"

"All I got for Christmas was a pack of sticky cards. It was difficult to deal with."

"What's the difference between the lavatory and the cemetery? No difference - when you gotta go, you gotta go!"

"When Lionel Messi dies.. He should have his Argentinian team mates bury him so they can let him down one last time.."