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Joke of the Day

"There are three unwritten rules of life. 1. 2. 3."

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"What do you call a women with one leg? ilene"
"Asking ""Why aren't you married yet"" is like asking ""Why haven't you jumped from a moving car yet?"" B/c it's painful and not required"
"People are lot less judgy when you say you ate an 'avocado salad' instead of a bowl of guacamole."
"I like my women like I like my shirts With a deep V"
"A nurse finds a rectal thermometer in her pocket. and thinks ""Some asshole has my pen""."
"Why did the girl take a ruler to bed? She wanted to see how long she slept."
"What did sushi A say to sushi B? WASSA-B!!!"
"What is Joan of Arc's least favorite food? Steak"
"I told my vodka about you."