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Joke of the Day
"Why aren't jokes in base eight funny? Because 7, 10, 11!"
Next Joke
"I'm sure everything will be fine. I'm sure of lots of things that are wrong. I'm highly fallible."
"When you say the word ""poop"" your mouth makes the same shape as your butthole when you poop The same can be said for ""explosive diarrhea"""
"What do you call someone who's afraid of Santa getting stuck in their chimney? Claus-trophobic."
"What do you call the Mother Superior of a corrupt convent? Nun the Wiser"
"[clenching fists] ""I'll fight someone"" Waiter: For the last time sir, 'cheese plate' describes the items on the plate not the plate itself"
"A chemist and his friend walk into a bar... The chemist asks the bartender for some H2O. His friend is trying to be cool and says ""Hey, I'll have an H20 too"". Then the friend dies."
"Just spent a nice relaxing hour on facebook, writing ""you Two look fantastic!!"" on all weekend selfies with three girls or more in it."
"My cheap boss... Talks so much shit. I guess its hard to defecate when you're major tight ass."
"Talk is cheap because supply exceeds demand."