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Joke of the Day

"Ok No Loitering sign, let's get one thing straight: the type of people who loiter are not the type of people who know what loitering means."

"2015 twilight zone episode abt me wanting to get jacked so my clothes fit better but then I get so jacked they look too tight and weird"

"If you ever fart in public, just yell, ""Turbo power!"" and walk faster"

"What is a baby's dream job? Working at a winery."

"Make a fire with someone and they'll be warm for a night. Make a fire with someone and they'll be warm for the rest of their life."

"I asked my wife for sex recently... She said, ""No, it's a super moon, not a blue one""."

"If you notice This notice, then you will notice that this notice is not worth noticing."

"i just finished breaking bad. what happens to hanks minerals. I don't like loose ends man. what happened to the minerals"

"What does a man with a tiny penis have for breakfast? Well this morning I had a PopTart, 2 eggs and a glass of orange juice."

"Why did the ska kid not get the job?... they were worried about his checkered past"