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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a Amish man with his arm up a horses arse A mechanic"

"When I die, I want people to think back lovingly about me and say ""oh, I thought she was already dead"""

"You know what really grinds my gears? Oxidation"

"I volunteer a lot at a children's hospice... It never gets old."

"Would the Government cope in a zombie apocalypse? Vacant, horrible, disoriented people stumbling around without purpose. Plus the zombies."

"Wait come back, I didn't mean it when I was just being myself"

"i just woke up from a 9 year coma! hope to god The Apprentice is off TV...nothing i hate more than that Donald Trump"

"My favorite pick-up line: Hey girl, my name is Tony. You know what that is backwards? Y not."

"I believe it was Benjamin Franklin who said: ""You have reached the end of you free trial membership at BenjaminFranklinQuotes.com."""

"Where does Neckwear go on vacation? Thailand."