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Joke of the Day

"anyone remember this funny one ?? ''u miss 100% of the shots u don't take'' -wain gretski -michel scoot ! XD"

"Even if oil prices go down, I'm still going to siphon gas from my neighbor's car because I like the adrenaline rush and he's an asshole."

"My girlfriend asked me what I feel about being with her. I told her what I truly feel. Numbness radiating down my left arm."

"Clearly, who ever said ""more than a hand full is a waste"" never have actually had their hand on more than a hand full."

"*Follows dreams *Ends up at refrigerator."

"Toddler misbehaves, but follows it up with throwing his hands in the air and yelling ""Ta-da!"" so he won't get in trouble. Stealing it."

"What is something we all lost? The Game"

"Why are Jewish men circumcised ? Because a Jewish woman won't touch anything unless it's 50% off."

"How does Donald Trump plan to silence the terrorists? Muzzle 'em"

"happy easter everybody! remember it's not about the bunny but when scott stapp was nailed to that cross"