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Joke of the Day

"This joke I made up while in the shower What's the difference between my shower and everyone? My shower gets turned on by me."

"What do you call a nun in a wheelchair ? Virgin Mobile"

"My wife made me coffee this morning & winked at me when she handed me the cup. I've never been more scared of a drink in all of my life."

"kid theres no such thing as bad publicity. like you would think if a big article came out saying you suck shit it would be bad, but its good"

"Did you hear the guy who invented predictive text has died? His funfair will be held on a sundial. Funfair* Funfair* For ducks sake..."

"I added Paul walker on xbox live the other day.. too bad he spends most of his time on the dashboard"

"What's easier to get, aids or lung cancer? Depends what you smoke. (Not native speaker, sorry if it doesn't make sense)"

"The stir fry chef had to make a difficult decision. He was between a wok and a hot plate."

"5-year-old: I'll stop asking you to take our family to Disneyland Me: You finally understand we can't afford it 5: You should just send me"

"Did you hear about the fire man who lost his job? He was laid off."