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Joke of the Day

"I applied for a job as a Marsupial... Safe to say I didn't get it because I lacked the right Koalafications."

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"What's the only thing worse than a worm in your apple? Reposts"
"Pretty certain the day I die my body will be found tangled in Saran Wrap with an untouched sandwich on the counter."
"Why does the boss put clocks under employee's desk? Because he wanted them to work over-time~"
"Definition of laziness : It's a talent of taking rest before you get tired..........coz prevention is better than cure"
"Roses are Red, Violets are blue... ...I've got Alzheimers, cheese on toast"
"What do you call a phallic music scale, crushed under a piano? D-flat"
"Way down on the bottom of the twitter user licensing agreement in tiny font it says ""Say goodbye to your family"""
"Q: Older Brother: ""Hooray! School's out! I'm free! I'm free!"" A: Younger Brother: ""So what? I'm four!"""
"Hey imbecile, just because you are listening to loud music on your iPod, doesn't mean that the rest of the supermarket can't hear you fart"