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Joke of the Day

"Apparently Donald Trump's favourite film is E.T... Because it's about an illegal alien that goes home."

"Whats brown and sticky? anal"

"Why did the peanut go to jail? He was a-roasted peanut."

"Why should you never invest in bakeries? Because they have a high turnover rate."

"Yelling REEEEEMIX, when your boss stutters on a conference call is looked down upon."

"What was Roe v. Wade really about? The fastest way to get across a river."

"Can someone help me decide which Nirvana album to buy? Wait, Nevermind"

"On a stakeout. Getting bored. Wish these perps would do something. Oh crap. Got my dong stuck in my cd player."

"Australians don't have sex... Australians mate."

"I'm sorry I snort-laughed when you were saying your vows."