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Joke of the Day

"the cats out of the bag now... now the cats in the bag but you can still see its tail.. now the cats rolling around in some sand and dirt"

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"My father once told me, ""Son, if you want people to listen to what you have to say, claim it's something your father told you."""
"A chickpea goes to a liberal arts college... What's its major? Falafelphy"
"The most popular car brands are German, Japanese, and Italian. It's like losing WW2 is a prerequisite for making good autos."
"If we get pulled over this beer is yours. - Dads"
"You know what else is fun? Playing dead when your husband receives the credit card bill..."
"My wife calls my penis Nicolas Cage It's highly temperamental and tends to go off for no reason at all."
"Hmmm, why don't we try reincarnation. Here, take this razor blade and I'll leave you alone for a few moments... -me as a therapist"
"""I bought some dodgy steroids last week and I grew another penis"" ""Anabolic?"" ""No, just the penis"""
"How do you catch a unique rabbit? Unique up on him.. heh"
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