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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between the Holocaust and the Boston Marathon Bombing? The Boston Marathon Bombing ended a race."

"I was talking to a North African girl in her native language for hours. We just clicked."

"Lesbians be like ""Oh no it's the end of the world!"""

"What does Mrs. Potato Head call her husband's penis? The Dick-tater."

"I'd get a lot more sleep if I didn't insist on reading the entire internet every night."

"Somebody stole my mood ring I'm not sure how i feel about it"

"Michael J Fox called me earlier but of course he had dialed the wrong number."

"women wearing veils at their wedding arent fooling anybody. you invited us to this shit we know its you under there. cut the crap lady"

"A person followed me and then unfollowed me within 3 minutes. How can they judge me after only seeing 47 tweets?"

"What do you call a horse with a broken leg? Worthless"