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Joke of the Day

"Why do nuns always travel in pairs? Because one nun follows the other nun to make sure that nun doesn't get none."

"Reminder to any new followers...Ancestry.com is NOT a dating site...lesson learned...like 4 times."

"Excited for the return of Game of Thrones. Not excited for the return of the phrase, ""If you'd read the books, you'd know that..."""

"Pull all of your money out of Pepto-Bismol stocks immediately. There's some real liquidity problems over there."

"What's the first thing you should do when you bring a Thai girl home? Check to make sure your dick is bigger than hers."

"Cut out the middleman and just list 911 as your emergency contact."

"LPT: what to do when someone is having a seizure in a bathtub Throw in a load of laundry."

"Have you heard the one about the airplane? Never mind. It's over your head."

"My boys are gamers and I'm single It's like a race to see who can use the most batteries"

"A man wanks into a bar... ...and the bartender says ""We don't serve your typo here"""