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Joke of the Day

"I think if I was brutally ass raped by a unicorn, it would be of little consolation that they are fictional."

"What happens when the PS and XBOX servers go down? The ambulance comes lights and sirens, ""WII-U WII-U WII-U"" I'm sorry, I'll leave now ._."

"I went into a vegan slaughterhouse. Man, there was juice eveywhere!"

"Thanks for letting everyone on facebook know your phone is broken. I was already thinking about never calling or texting you anyway."

"here's my dating advice. Take your date to go-karts. everyone loves go-karts. I just solved your life. you're welcome"

"Yes, I've lost to my computer at chess. But it turned out to be no match for me at kickboxing."

"Police chase I was racing towards a cliff with police sirens ringing in my ears when I noticed my mirror was broken and I realized there was no looking back now"

"I snort bits of pork when I'm hungry. I call them hamboogers."

"""You are what you eat"" [Eats a confident person] Now we wait..."

"I dont want to make a joke but I really want to hear the most cancerous joke you know. If I get 100 of them I will show them all to my friend who hates cancerous jokes."