177569

Joke of the Day

"Disappointed the ATM didn't shoot out a burst of confetti to congratulate me for having enough to pull out twenty bucks."

"I would pay 5$ to see my girlfriend naked on the street I don't have a girlfriend, 5$ would be a good bargain"

"How far can a rabbit run into the woods? Halfway. After that she's running out of the woods."

"I was going to make a joke about a carp that had hands But it was too metacarpal."

"A yoga joke! What did the yogi say to his friends when they asked him to leave? ""Nah I'ma stay"""

"I accidentally wore a red shirt to Target today and, long story short, I'm covering for Debbie this weekend."

"Simple Math Problem How does one become a .666 Humorist? http://i.imgur.com/DVvbS15.png"

"A Rabbi and a Catholic Priest... are sitting on a park bench when a kid walks by. The Catholic Priest says, ""We should screw him!"" and the Rabbi says, ""Out of what?"""

"Why did the bank robber take a bath? So he could make a clean getaway."

"Two condoms walk past a gay bar One says to the other ""what do you say we go in there and get shit-faced?"""